Closing Down

It has been a month since I started this blog.

When I initially started it, I had a different vision and goal for this blog. I never quite got round the explaining it but it was basically to show off the goods I have purchased to people who are interested to know and really, to my then boyfriend. Little did I know, a few hours after bringing this blog to life he would be dumping me.

I still remember calling him, telling him I had a blog and to please come and visit kusadai! He was away in his mind thinking about guys or something and sounding disinterested. And, yeah.. he dumped me on my phone call, I hung up in sadness, anger and confusion. He didn't call back. I doubt he actually even remembers me telling him I have a blog but nevertheless, it doesn't matter now. It was semi-for-him then but things have changed. It ended even before it began, really.

So, things have changed. You may have noticed I even changed the title once. I don't feel comfortable posting here anymore. It doesn't feel as funny as I had envisioned it because it is difficult to be funny funny. Anyway, au revoir. Thank you minna san (everybody) for visiting. I can see from my stats I have good support.

An unwilling participant

I knew i could never change a man, yet I met a man who hoped I'd change him. 


And, I continue to cry at 2am with a long day shift pending come 8am. And, I hope again that one of the seemingly 'pleasantly confused' will tell me I am lovely and beautiful despite my puffy eyes. And, only to find they weren't confused.

Facial at Halls of Ivy

"I'm gonna flush out and cover up every hiding place so he has to come out. Cruel? Sounds like I'm doing him a favour and being his publicist FOC!" - I love the stuff I come up with

I had a facial session booked at a place I have been passing by recently. I didn't notice it before and it turns out they're only a year old. It's called Halls of Ivy and it is a beauty parlour as well as a beauty academy. BBC 3 awarded the parlour/owner 1st runner up Beautician of the Year...

So, I was going through their service and price list and they have a 1 hour Monu Aromatic Facial session for £35  which, I thought, wasn't too bad a price. They are opened all week except Monday, so it had to be done today.

I showed up pretty much on time but they thought I was late as the girl booked my appointment 30 minutes earlier. They were nice about it, though.

My yardstick to any facials I get is: Aster Spring: Origin of Beauty in Malaysia. Price also compare la.

The place looked quite nice la but not spa-ish. Looks more like how someone would decorate a house in a modern punya English-type decoration i.e. one wall with a fancy coloured wall paper, a radio, a nice cupboard with decorative flower-candles, their table and no wash basin in the room. Should have taken photo! But you can see it here.

The bed was like one of those beds with a hole where you can put the face but they've covered it with a rather furry decorative towel. I doubt it is washed everyday cos they just line it with tissue like they do on hospital out-patient couches. No pillow under your knees. No towel to cover you when you get cold but the bed was heated la, thank god. So, I was thinking, is it cheaper to wash towels or heat a bed?

Then, they will get you to undress in private but the towel is probably at most 50cm long. I am not that tiny but neither am I fat; I couldn't wrap it around my chest. It was really weird la. Imagine the fat lady with tetek besar; she'd be lucky if the towel just about reached each nipple medially. Worse was when she later gave me the head band to put in myself so I mess up my hair instead of them (shifting responsibility at the next level). I was already using my upper arms to hold the little towel down. How do I do this without the towel dropping? A gay man might have bluffed me into think I had a solid relationship but luckily I not so stupid, lie down and put it on.

So everything was pretty much standard la. Wash, exfoliate, mask, massage, tone and moisturize.

The good:
1) Excellent application of each product. Every time was a massage. Her fingers were always warm! Her touch was like a fairy's. So smooth. So relaxing I was almost in dreamland
2) Offer me water
3) Don't have to omong-kosong too much
4) The price isn't too bad.

The not-so-good:
1) No steamer and steaming
2) No extractions
3) No towel but got heated bed
4) Just under one-hour. More like 45 minutes
5) I doubt the product is not tailored to the skin. And, not very aromatic for an aromatic facial. After five-hours, my skin felt dry and if I didn't top-up my own, I think it will become oily too. I have combination skin.

Verdict:
I think it was OK la. Three stars. I don't think, even after three sessions, my face would have that glow I get when I go to Aster Spring. I would go back to the place but not do the same facial (this is their only one-hour facial) again. Will want to try the microdermabrasion to see if I can get rid of some of my acne scars. :-(

Package from Amazon

I have been slow to post. A bit sluggish motor-wise.

Will be working tonight and I tried to stay in bed as long as possible. My mind not really thinking nor dreaming but my little heart betrays me; it continues to yearn, long, calls and - the universe forbids - love this guy. And minute beads of tears collect at the corner of my eye.

So, I had to get up to let the numb mind take over. My little heart has quieten, I am tired but can't go back to bed. Little heart, why do you betray me?

And so I sigh...

On Monday, a new package appeared outside my door. Not a big surprise since no one buys me stuff online except myself. And, even buying online is a recent thing I have only engaged in the last year when I lived in a remote village neither here nor there...

Anyway, from Amazon...

What could this beeee?

Philips Satinelle Soft HP6509 Epilator
Hmmmm.....
Just under £30.
Pretty cheap considering most epilators were rather expensive just a couple of years ago.

The back of the box showing what it can do: epilate (for the legs), shave (the pits and bikini line), two speed settings, bag and a 72db noise level...  Not that I paid much attention since I read all of it on Amazon

It's a basic set for the price. Comes with the motor with an epilator head, shaving head, guards for both and a cleaning brush. It has more than a hundred good reviews compared to the more expensive epilators.

So I, uhm, tried it on Tuesday night. It took about 2-3 whole minutes before I even dared to put the thing over my skin. I thought it was just gonna rip my skin, fat, muscle and down to bare bone...

Finally I plucked the courage to put it on the very fine hairs on my legs. Hmmm, was ok la. I didn't bother epilating my legs because the hairs really aren't visible. I still don't dare put it any where else on my body... hahaha. Still building the mental courage. Maybe in a few weeks time.

Actually I have been thinking of buying an epilator for a long time now. Two years, I guess because I remember watching this video below. I also remember my then boyfriend watching it with me and encouraging me to get it (why didn't he buy it for me?). She is so funny and I thought she was funny because I agree shaving your pits on YouTube is terribly embarrassing. I think she was one of the first people to expose and epilate her pits on the channel...

LOL

Sigh, it's strange how an epilator still reminds me of him...


Update: OMG, literally tried it on the pits after being encouraged by the video. It hurts la but it's not that bad. Once the hair is out, you can run the thing over and over and it doesn't even feel like anything. The follicles are a bit raw like it is after shaving but some talc (or maybe aftershave?) might do... Defo need to exfoliate everyday.

If you see me standing like this, you know why...

Retail Therapy

I wanted to sleep in all day today but was wide awake by 10am. Then, starting moping. Mope, mope, mope. Googling, getting angry, more angry, thinking, thinking. Not really achieving anything. I thought I was gonna pick myself up, exercise, go out and take a passport photo of myself. If I didn't achieve that, I'd be very angry at myself.

So I got dressed and went out on a mission... and shopping.

OMG, I thought luckily I procrastinated in buying my ex-boyfriend a SuperDry Windcheater! Would have been such a waste of money since he dumped me and isn't contributing to retail therapy. Of note, he also advised me to go for retail therapy. WTF, right? Don't tell me what to do when you've just dumped me. As they say, no money, shaddap.

First stop was HMV. My ex liked going to HMV a lot. I tried not to think about it because I really wanted some music so my head would think of other things esp when exercising. I was looking for cheap-ish hip-hop and R&B for £5. Picked up Jay-Z, Tinie Tempah and Professor Green but something was playing in-store which and the melody really grabbed me. Then, I listened to the lyrics and it made the back of my hair stand. I walked round and round and round listening to half the album and the songs continued to give me that feeling..... Shazam'ed the songs, dropped all three albums and picked up Ed Sheeran's Deluxe + album to make a semi-swift escape...

Ed Sheeran. + Deluxe
Songs that reflect my feelings of the past, present and hopes for the future.. :'-(
And it is fuzzily comforting the songs are always directed to a girl
If you ever read this, thank you, Ed for making such a beautiful and meaningful album.. (altho you shud also thank me for buying your album)

Besides my passport photos, I made a mental list of other things I wanted but not massively important to get today. So, I popped into Boots:

1) Moisturizer

2) Body scrub

3) Bronzer/blusher

4) Eye liner

5) Kit of EcoTools bamboo make-up brushes (between £15-£20!)

6) Bath sponge

7) Mineral powder

Botanics Enriching Body Cream £5.61; Botanics Cleansing Body Scrub at half price £2.29 and Rimmel Exaggerate Waterproof Eyeliner (very good, hardly smudges) £3.99.

Walked round and round and round... Really hoping 6pm doesn't come too soon because I didn't wanna go home..

KFC? McD's? Went to Sainsbury's je la.. This week's shopping was only £14.77, so I guess last week's expensive spend is evened out..

Tonight's dinner. I was going to *treat* myself.
Clockwise:
Warburton's Pitta Chips - quite good, tastes like tortilla
Magner's Apple and Ginger Cider - hmmm, where was the ginger?
Doritos Hot Salsa
Be Good to Yourself Guacamole - treat also must try to minimize calories la
Be Good to Yourself Soured Cream and Chive - surprisingly very good for a 'light' version
Pumpkin falafels - really should be eaten with hummus rather than dips

My other regular, boring buys to cook a giant pot of food for the rest of the week, tomorrow

Tried to make an effort with my no-effort dinner whilst watching X-Factor.
I really liked 'em Essex Two Shoes!

Before I left, I dropped off a roll of 36 exposures for development and print which I'll pick up tomorrow. If there's anything nice, I'll post it.

And, I did achieve my one goal of taking passport photos of myself...

Finally, a youtube video of Autumn Leaves; a song that reflects my feelings of the present :'-( which I would like to move away from but feel like my hands and feet are chained to some haunted thing.

Pleasant Surprise

Didn't buy anything today but got given something instead.


Was at work earlier when my colleague stopped me and said he has a present for me. Dugged really deep down his pocket. I thought, "probably bringing up his list to give me a job to do, sigh"...

He finally managed to get whatever it was and he pulled this out:

M&M's Peanuts

It was already half eaten but he had folded it back nicely. That really made my day. Every bite was delicious!

Simple things...

Sunday Supermarket Shop

Hello guys and girls,

Been wanting to update two days dah but Sunday was a really bad day for me la. My heart and mind was in a really dark place. I went to a BBQ on Saturday night; thought meet new people will help me feel better. Ended up missing my ex-boyfriend more! Sunday morning wake up feel memang terrible. Mope, mope, then finally went to supermarket. Supermarket seriously made me feel better la, dunno everyone there but seem like I know them also. We all got something in common, wanna buy stuff for the home. Watch the daddy and the mummy and the kids. No dogs or cats la. Everybody doing their usual Sunday supermarket shop.

Monday le, busy doing presentation for today. Picked a super hard topic to present on summore, Really asking for trouble le. But people said was good (!!?! thank you!) so ok la.

So, have to be quiet focused or else I will buy the whole shop and cannot carry home. That one memang kantoi la. So shop, shop.. then checkout. Wa super shocked. Only my backpack full and one recyclable bag used already £39.34. How can, right? Last time £20 can buy until die carrying.

See!! So little things only right already £39.34. How can??
Clockwise: Milk, Chai Tea Latte, 3 boxes of fish, Belvoir elderflower cordial, Ambrosia light rice pudding, dried milk powder, contact lens eye drops, croquette, eyebrow pencil, black-brown masara, Taste the Difference Pesto Genovese, sundried tomatoes and a punnet of peaches.

 Highlights of my purchases (which is almost everything since it's so little!):

Cannot seem to get it the right way..
My ex-boyfriend memang suka this one. I buy cos I also like la but he like more.
Now he's gone means more for me lor. + thinking.

Been craving ice-cold cordial like crazy.
This is is quite nice cos no preservative but must drink in 3 weeks. Boleh la!
Summore I like the bottle a lot.

Didn't plan to buy one but I saw it and I must have it.
Got three flavours: classic, ginger & lemongrass, something else
Looks like made for German market. Taste also like for German market.
Very rich, creamy and sweet taste... My Indian friend don't really make chai tea like that.. but I guess this is 'latte'

Can't seem to find my 'regular' make-up kit. So bought new one.
Maybe it does make it look longer la cos my oriental lashes so fine, anything that de-fines it makes it look longer
My ex-boyfriend got super nice lashes girls will die for. I always said if we had a daughter, all the other girls will be soooooooooooooo jealous. Too bad.

Lost my favourite Japanese brow definer la. Have to settle for this second class black-brown brow  pencill

So, Sunday mar. Must cook for the rest of the week...

Goreng (fry) some onion and chilli
Too lazy to peel and chop the garlic although it would have been a very good thing to do.

Tambah (add) the skinless and boneless haddock mixed with chopped sundried tomatoes.
This fish kinda pecah (break) la. But didn't completely disintegrate.

Spaghetti, Genovese pesto, stir, stir and hey presto!

So, now I have to exercise and then can makan my spaghetti topped with Parmesan cheese! Yum, yum, rub my tum!